Chapter 154: Absorption (2) (Illustration)
Translator: bjgoofy
At my words, the leader of the River Bandits stared at me with a dazed expression, as if he'd taken a palm strike to the head.
And behind him, the dumbfounded faces of the other River Bandits turned my way.
Apparently, being told they'd done something they hadn't done struck them as absurd.
'Why? What? What do you want me to do about it, punk?'
But at times like this, the best policy was to be as shameless as possible.
When I stared back at them with a face that said tough luck, the bandit leader waved his hands in a fluster, insisting they had never done any such thing.
"Wh-what are you... We merely heard a ship without a Family Banner was passing through the Three Gorges of the Yangtze and came to confirm it... We never even boarded; we only asked for a small toll from outside the ship... well, perhaps not so small..."
The type of person I hated most wasn't the insolent sort, nor the rude sort, but the sort who couldn't take a hint.
Why? Because they were exasperating, and they kept forcing me to spell everything out.
'My mouth gets tired, you know?'
Even back in my streaming days, I could forgive viewers who made cheeky cracks or jokes that crossed the line, but viewers who couldn't follow along and rambled off on their own got banned without a second's hesitation.
I gave the bandit leader a single glance, then called Cho over and spoke while stroking her head.
If they couldn't remember what they'd done, I would simply have to help them remember.
They seemed to be suffering from short-term amnesia, and the best cure for any kind of memory loss was, of course, shock therapy.
"Oh dear. Are the little ones hungry? Cho, are you hungry? Shall we get you something to eat? It just so happens we've got some freshly water-washed, plump and meaty..."
-Tssrit? 「Eat? Eat what?」
'No, no, Daddy's just playing around.'
-Tss? 「Why?」
'Uh... well, you see... to give that man over there a scare?'
-Tss? 「Why scare him?」
'....'
Would you look at that.
If they'd been quick enough to take the hint, I wouldn't be stuck suffering through Cho's endless Why?'s now, would I?
While I was being tormented inside my head by the questions of Cho, whose case of the why-disease grew worse by the day, the bandit leader, who seemed to have finally caught on, came wriggling toward my feet like a caterpillar and cried out with desperate eyes.
"N-now that I think of it! It w-was us, it really was! W-we must have been so startled by your spirit beasts that we lost our wits for a moment and couldn't remember!
Blinded by greed, we stormed aboard the Tang Family's ship to plunder its riches! Yes, that's exactly right!"
Sure enough, after a good strong jolt to the brain, the bandit leader declared that his memories had come flooding back.
Well, strictly speaking, these were memories that plainly didn't exist, but when a man's life hangs by a thread, even memories that never happened have a way of surfacing.
I decided to meticulously fill in the memories he'd left out.
He had skipped over something important, after all.
"Tut, tut. Why are you leaving out the part where you insulted the young lady of the Tang Family!?"
"Th-the insult too, that was us! We deserve to die!"
"And what about snapping the family's banner to get around the Unwritten Rule?"
"R-right you are. The Family Banner! We broke the Family Banner too!"
At their leader's cry, the River Bandits all nodded along together.
Soon enough, not just the leader but the bandits themselves were taking turns answering my questions.
"So then, who had the gall to snap the Tang Family's banner?"
"Him! It was him! I saw it!"
"Th-that's right. It was me! Young Master! I broke it."
"Then where did that Family Banner go?"
"Uh... that's it! The w-water! It sank into the water!"
"Does a banner tied to a wooden pole sink in water?"
"Urk! O-of course not! We t-tied it to a rock and sank it! That's right. A rock!"
Now the bandits were assembling their own defendant, eyewitness, and even circumstantial evidence among themselves.
I crossed my arms and muttered to myself with a grave expression.
"My, my... now that I think it over carefully, these truly are crimes worthy of death, aren't they?"
"They are. Soryong? Such wicked deeds... we ought to round them all up and toss them out as dog food... no, spirit beast food, don't you think?"
Seol noona, delighted with how things were unfolding, chimed in right on cue.
The little brother sang and Seol noona beat the drum; the two of us were in perfect rhythm.
"Oh, please! Spare us!"
"Young Master, please, we beg for your mercy!"
The River Bandits whimpered and whined; soaked through as they were, I couldn't tell whether those were real tears or merely a performance.
-Tsurururu!
Cho, apparently finding the bandits' reactions amusing, let out a single growl, and a few of the more faint-hearted ones shrieked and foamed at the mouth on the spot.
'That should be enough.'
I had cured the bandits' amnesia completely, and now that every last one of them had confessed his crimes, it felt as though they were finally in the right frame of mind to discuss the terms of a settlement.
I casually broached the subject.
"So, you who appear to be the leader of these River Bandits... your name?"
"L-Lee Tae, the B-Blood Wind Boatman of the Three Gorges of the Yangtze!"
In the martial world, an Alias was a title given much like a nickname, and as a rule it wasn't something one gave oneself; others bestowed it, out of respect.
It was crafted to capture the character of one's martial arts or personality; Hwa-eun's own Alias, the Poisonous Flower China Rose, carried within it the meaning of a beautiful woman who wielded the arts of poison.
The poison stood for the rose's thorns, and her beauty was likened to the flower itself.
But no one would ever bother bestowing an Alias on a River Bandit, so it was almost certainly self-given; I let slip a snort of laughter and said,
"Ah, so all along you were the great Master Blood Wind Boatman."
"M-Master? You f-flatter me, truly."
"Yes, well, in any case. Blood Wind Boatman, your offenses are exceedingly grave, but I happen to dislike the sight of blood. So I'm thinking of accepting a reasonable apology and leaving it at that. What say you?"
The moment the words left my mouth, a light of hope rose in the bandits' faces, which had gone black as death.
They had been trembling in terror at the prospect of touring the belly of a giant centipede or spider, and now a way out had revealed itself.
A lifeline had been lowered to save their necks; how could they not seize it?
He thundered at his own subordinates.
"Th-thank you, Young Master! Thank you! What are you all standing around for!? Apologize, all of you, this instant!?"
The moment I mentioned accepting a reasonable apology, Lee Tae, the bandit leader, began badgering his men and pressing them to apologize.
At his shout, the River Bandits all bowed their heads low and apologized.
"W-we're so sorry! Young Master."
"Please forgive us! Young Master."
"We were wrong! Young Master!"
I had said I'd accept a reasonable apology, and it seemed they intended to settle the entire matter with nothing but their lips. That was a problem.
I was a man who had come from living in a capitalist world.
Which was precisely why a verbal apology meant nothing to me.
People say what matters in an apology is its sincerity, that it must come from the heart. But the heart is a thing invisible to the eye.
If the heart were the standard, there would be no way to measure how deeply the other side was actually repenting, which is why, under capitalism, an apology made with the mouth alone is meaningless.
Because you cannot gauge the other party's sincerity.
Then by what does a capitalist society gauge the sincerity of an apology?
By the weight of money.
Pay 100 won, and it's a 100-won apology; pay 1,000 won, and it's a 1,000-won apology.
'Not that I need the money or anything, but rules are rules.'
I sat through the torrent of apologies pouring from the bandits, and when a lull came, I asked Lee Tae,
"From what Hwa-eun told me a little while ago, the side that breaks the Unwritten Rule must offer a gift of apology in order to make amends..."
At that, Lee Tae flinched.
He studied my face for a moment, then explained in a desperate voice.
"Y-Young Master. B-because we work as River Bandits on the Three Gorges of the Yangtze, the world often gets the wrong idea about us, but we are not so wealthy.
To avoid the government troops that patrol from time to time, we must pick foggy days or days when they're absent, and when the monsoon swells the river, we can't even put a boat in the water.
And do you think that's all?
More ships sail under the protection of the Nine Great Sects and the Five Great Families by the day, so even with our banditry we barely keep food in our mouths. Just recently the waters rose so suddenly that we couldn't launch a boat for more than ten days.
Today, too, after ten days of nothing but fishy-smelling fish, we heard a ship without a Family Banner was passing through and rushed out in a great hurry..."
Behind him, the River Bandits nodded along to Lee Tae's words, their eyes brimming with tears.
"We just wanted a bowl of rice..."
"Sniff... we're really not such bad men."
'Oh ho, so these bastards are trying the waterworks?'
Just as the rascals were trying to brazen their way out with an empty-handed apology...
"S-Soryong, sir!"
"Helmsman?"
While we had been talking, the Helmsman, who had disappeared toward the cabin with one of the boatmen, came running over in a hurry to report.
"Th-the young miss went on a rampage and threw people at the ship, and now it's taking on water again!"
'Damn it all.'
We had patched the ship up temporarily and had been climbing the fierce currents of the Three Gorges of the Yangtze with great care for fear it might leak, but with Cho's rampage, something must have gone wrong with the makeshift repairs.
"Is it leaking badly?"
"Yes, we need to put in somewhere, anywhere, and see to the ship at once!"
When I asked about the ship's condition, the Helmsman said it needed emergency repairs.
Just as dismay crossed my face, the voice of Lee Tae, the bandit chief, rose from down by my feet.
"Y-Young Master! The ship... we can repair it!"
"You can repair the ship?"
My expression said it plainly: what River Bandit could possibly repair a ship, and wasn't this just a reckless gambit to save his own skin? Lee Tae hurriedly cried out,
"Th-there is a superb Shipwright at our hideout!"
"A Shipwright?"
When I tilted my head at the unfamiliar word, the Helmsman beside me answered in his stead.
"A craftsman who builds ships."
At that, Lee Tae nodded vigorously.
"Yes, a craftsman who builds ships. How do you suppose we sink ships so well? It's because we know everything there is to know about them. P-please, just trust us this once! He's a Shipwright from Fujian Province!"
"Fujian Province!? Is that the truth!?"
"O-of course it is. Why would I lie at a time like this?"
The Helmsman's face had lit up at the mention of Fujian Province, which struck me as odd, so I shot him a look demanding an explanation, and he explained the reason for his delight.
"A Shipwright from Fujian Province means a shipwright of the very finest caliber. Our ship was built in Fujian as well. If that man's words are true, he will surely know how to look after our vessel."
"Oho, is that so?"
Seeing my interest, Lee Tae said with an ingratiating chuckle,
"Young Master, if we might offer the ship's repair in place of the gift of apology..."
He seemed to be suggesting the repair as a substitute for the gift, but before he could even finish speaking, I nodded and answered.
"Very well. As my gift of apology, I'll take that Shipwright."
It was, after all, a gift of apology perfectly suited to an accident where the fault lay one hundred percent with them.
***
As we headed for the River Bandits' hideout to collect the gift of apology and have the ship repaired, the matter of the two venomous creatures' names rose to the fore.
First came the name of Ice and Snow's baby, over which Seol noona and Hwa-eun had been agonizing: Naeng-i or Dong-i. [TL Note: Naeng-i means "Cold One" and Dong-i means "Frozen One", both names fitting the baby's ice-natured parents.]
"It even saved Soryong; it's unthinkable for it not to have a name. We need to decide on one as soon as possible."
"Right. We can't go on calling it 'baby' forever."
The little one had even earned the merit of saving my life, and for it to still lack a name was, indeed, unthinkable.
"Which is exactly why Dong-i..."
"Which is exactly why Naeng-i..."
They had a point, but their opinions remained locked in a stalemate with no sign of narrowing, so I shook my head and said,
"Let's go with whichever name the baby likes."
"The baby, you mean?"
"The baby?"
"Yes. We'll call it by the name it likes, not the name the two of you like."
Honestly, as its owner I could simply have decided on my own, but then Seol noona and Hwa-eun would have been so hurt they'd never have let me hear the end of it.
I had already worried them over Moon Shadow's poison, and if I handled this matter unilaterally on top of that, I'd land squarely in their bad books; so if the two of them couldn't reach a decision, the one receiving the name could decide for itself.
Then neither of them would have a word to say against it, that much was certain.
"Little one, do you like the name Naeng-i? Or do you like the name Dong-i?"
I set Snow and Ice's baby down on the table and asked, and the little thing tilted its head.
-Kkwit?
-Kkukku.
-Kkuu.
The little one, head tilted at my question, listened to something Snow and Ice told it, then crawled up onto Hwa-eun's shoulder and answered.
-Kkyuuu.
Judging by its face, which looked very much like it was smiling, it seemed to like Dong-i.
"You like Dong-i?"
-Squeak!
"Why! Naeng-i isn't bad either!?"
Seol noona wore a look of deep disappointment, but what could anyone do when Dong-i itself liked the name?
And so Dong-i came to bear the name Dong-i.
Next up for debate was Moon Shadow.
The opinion had been raised that for a creature bearing yang-natured poison, a name like Moon Shadow, a symbol of yin energy, simply didn't fit.
"We should give Moon Shadow a new name as well. 'Wol' means moon and 'yeong' means shadow. Both symbolize yin energy, so it's not a fitting name for a child carrying yang-natured poison."
"Right. Ryong, the name Moon Shadow is downright insulting to the little one."
True enough, we had always given the children names suited to their appearance or nature, and considering this one's fire-eating trait, a name steeped in yin energy was hardly fitting.
'Cho, could you ask Moon Shadow how it feels about changing its name?'
-Tssrit!
When I checked Moon Shadow's wishes through Cho, the feeling that came back was one of utter delight.
The name had been given by the Buddhist nuns who had starved it for ten years, so it seemed the little one had never much cared for it.
I decided to entrust its naming to Seol noona.
It was to soothe some of her disappointment over not getting to name Dong-i.
"Seol noona, why don't you give Moon Shadow its new name?"
"R-really!?"
Seol noona, who had been moping over failing to bestow the name Naeng-i, brightened instantly when asked to do the naming.
She sank into thought for a moment, then proposed a fine name.
"Then, how about Hwayang?"
"Hwayang?"
"Mm-hm. Moon Shadow meant the shadow of the moon, didn't it? So the exact opposite ought to be Ilyang, the light of the sun, but that sounds far too much like a boy's name. Hwayang, 'fire sun', seemed like it would suit a boy or a girl equally well. We don't know its sex yet, after all."
"Hwayang, hm..."
Taken by its meaning, the name signified blazing sunlight.
A fitting name, most likely, for a creature prickly enough to spray water at a Buddhist nun.
"How does Hwayang sound for your new name?"
At my question, the little one wagged its hind legs as if in approval.
Then it was settled: its name would be Hwayang.
"It seems to like it too, Seol noona. I think it's a fine name as well."
"Wonderful!"
It was just after I had nodded to Seol noona and told her it was a good name.
Something had slipped past as if it were nothing, yet it nagged faintly at the back of my mind.
Tilting my head, I wondered what on earth it could be, and then the oddity I'd carelessly overlooked surfaced.
'Wait a minute!? L-legs!?'
I rubbed my startled eyes and looked again: legs that had shot up during the two days I'd been poisoned by its venom.
The little one's hind legs had already grown in, tiny and adorable.
<img src="https://i.ibb.co/PvfjM95w/ch-154.jpg" alt="" />
*****
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