Chapter 115: Stolen Goods (1)

Translator: bjgoofy

Hwa-eun sat in the pavilion with her cheeks flushed, her gaze fixed on the ground.

-Gguk...

-Gguu...

"Hmm...."

Each time the squirming sounds of Snow and Ice came from within the bushes, Hwa-eun’s cheeks turned bright red, only to settle down again, repeating the cycle.

Apparently embarrassed, Hwa-eun couldn’t even make eye contact with me, fidgeting with her fingers for a while.

Only after the sounds died down did Hwa-eun cautiously ask in an attempt to break the awkward atmosphere.

“Um, if they were going to do that- no, I mean... then why were they fighting?”

It seemed that Hwa-eun thought Snow and Ice had been fighting because Ice bit the back of Snow’s neck and Snow screamed while running around in all directions.

However, that’s how lizard mating usually is.

When an ovulating female and a male in heat meet, their mating doesn’t begin with a romantic courtship but with the male subduing the female.

Since mating begins only after the male bites and restrains the female by her cheek, neck, or tail to immobilize her, the scene can appear rather violent.

Moreover, the ‘Kkuk! Kkuk! Kkuk!’ sound that Hwa-eun imitated, saying it was made during the fight, was actually a mating call. Some male lizards make this squee-ing sound while biting the female’s cheek or neck.

The meaning behind it is something like, “Bear my children.”

In short, male lizards are real macho types.

Well, it was understandable that Hwa-eun misunderstood.

Usually, the subduing process ends quietly and without fuss.

The likely reason the two made such a commotion was their lack of experience.

If the female isn’t ready or lacks experience when the male begins to subdue her, she resists fiercely. To an unknowing outsider, that can appear as a big fight, and that’s probably what Hwa-eun witnessed.

To clear up Hwa-eun’s misunderstanding, I explained.

“They weren’t fighting. That’s just one part of the mating process. Mating only begins after the male subdues the female so she can’t move.”

"Ma, ma-ma-ma-mating!?"

At my explanation, Hwa-eun stammered as if she was about to collapse from high blood pressure.

It seemed this topic was too much for Hwa-eun, the daughter of a wealthy family.

She already had no tolerance for anything remotely lewd, and now she had directly witnessed the sacred act of animal reproduction, and even received a detailed explanation to go along with it.

“Yes, no need to worry. But in any case, I don’t think we’ll be able to go to the Murim Alliance.”

I wanted to tease her a bit more, but considering she might actually faint from the blood pressure spike, I shifted the topic to the Murim Alliance visit in an attempt to lighten the mood.

“W-we can’t go? Why not?”

At my words, Hwa-eun looked at me with an expression as if wondering what the mating of the lizards had to do with going to the Murim Alliance.

But there was a reason for it.

While it varies by species, typical lizards lay eggs anywhere from two weeks to two months after mating.

Snow and Ice were spiritual creatures, so their case might be a bit different, but if we departed for the Murim Alliance, they could end up laying eggs during the journey.

Given their nature, they would definitely try to follow me, and if that happened, laying eggs on the roadside would be inevitable.

The problem is, I had never raised this species before, so I had no way of knowing whether they laid eggs in sand, in decaying leaf litter, or if they were brooded by the parents. And hatching eggs on the roadside?

That would make successful hatching highly unlikely.

That’s why I couldn’t participate in the journey to the Murim Alliance.

Even setting up various birth environments and receiving the eggs properly might not be enough, and roadside egg-laying? That was something that absolutely had to be avoided.

“Since they mated today, Snow will likely start laying eggs in about two weeks to a month. If we say we’re going to the Murim Alliance, they’ll definitely follow us, so we won’t be able to go.

If they follow us, they’ll end up laying eggs during the trip, and since we don’t even know how to hatch them, we’ll miss the optimal time, and the eggs will surely rot without hatching.”

“I see. Then I’ll stay behind... Oh, I’ve never hatched eggs from before, so it’ll have to be Soryong who stays. In any case, we should either give Grandfather a detailed explanation about the venom of the Mountain Viper or prepare a proper letter.”

Hwa-eun nodded at my explanation.

At first, it seemed like Hwa-eun was going to offer to stay behind and tell me to go, but just as she concluded, I was the one who absolutely had to remain.

That’s because I was the only one in the Tang Family who had experience hatching eggs from lizards other than Snow and Ice.

Having someone else stay behind wouldn’t be of any help.

Well, I’d have to prepare a detailed presentation-style PPT to explain the poison, but

"If I make it so it’s easy to understand at a glance, that should be enough, right? Ah, will Seol Noona be a bit disappointed?"

Seol Noona, who had been so excited about traveling through the Central Plains with us, might be disappointed, but there was no helping it.

This was the fate of a breeder, after all.

Once your creatures multiply and start reproducing like this, traveling becomes nothing more than a dream, such is the life of a breeder, isn’t it?

“Then, when should we tell them?”

“Probably best to mention it over tea after dinner, along with the happy news.”

“Got it, Soryong.”

Snow and Ice were already cute, so just imagining how cute their babies would be made my heart pound in anticipation.

Big round eyes, little mouths, and adorable tails.

Lizard hatchlings are really cute, after all.

***

That evening, during dinner at the Tang Family.

At the Tang Family, they usually finish eating first and then drink tea while having a conversation. Once the chatter began, I immediately told Seol Noona, Grandfather, and Father-in-law that it seemed I wouldn’t be able to go to the Murim Alliance.

“Grandfather, actually, I don’t think I’ll be able to go to the Murim Alliance this time due to unavoidable circumstances.”

“You can’t go? Why not? Is it because of Bin? Didn’t I tell you that I’d dispatch our family warriors to continue the search?

As for the venom of the Mountain Viper, it’s best if you explain it yourself...

Well, the child has left and hasn’t returned home yet, so I suppose leaving the house wouldn’t be right either. If she comes back, there needs to be someone to greet her, right? Then I suppose there’s no choice.”

“Soryong can’t go? Why not? You said you’d come with me to the Murim Alliance!”

The Man of Ten Thousand Poisons, Grandfather, nodded in understanding, but Seol Noona asked again with a disappointed expression upon hearing that I probably wouldn’t be going.

Even though the warriors from Beast Palace had come with her, she clearly didn’t want to make the journey to the Murim Alliance alone.

The original plan had been to stop by the Tang Family to create some samples and then head directly to the Murim Alliance with Nunim.

Although the plan was delayed by a few days due to looking for Bin, who had left home, even departing immediately wouldn’t have been strange.

Then, in response to Seol Noona’s question, Hwa-eun cautiously spoke in my place.

“Um, we think we’re going to become grandparents... Still, I’m going to go. Unnie.”

“Grandparents?”

“You’re going to be grandparents?”

“What are you talking about?”

“Hwa-eun, what do you mean by that?”

The Man of Ten Thousand Poisons and Seol Noona looked at each other with bewildered expressions.

Father-in-law and Mother-in-law also blinked, unable to follow the conversation.

One might think it was moving a bit fast for an unmarried daughter to become a mother, but becoming a grandmother, even at the fastest speed, was impossible.

-Gguk-ggu?

-Gguu?

To explain why we couldn’t go, Hwa-eun placed Snow and Ice on the table. The two of them tilted their heads with adorable expressions, and Hwa-eun looked at me with flushed cheeks.

Clearly, she was too embarrassed to explain it herself and wanted me to do it for her.

[Pl-please... speak for me...]

I gave a slight nod at the whispering voice and began explaining to the elders.

“Actually, Snow and Ice formed a pair and had their first mating today.

So we think they’ll start laying eggs sometime between two weeks and two months, which means if we leave now, they’ll end up laying eggs during the journey, so unfortunately...”

“Oh my! Really!?”

“Oho! So these two are going to become parents!?”

“Son-in-law, is that true!?”

Even Father-in-law’s face lit up with delight.

Everyone was happy at the news that Snow and Ice  were going to become parents.

“Yes, Father-in-law.”

“Goodness, we only just opened the Venomous Creatures Garden, and already you’ve discovered two poisons strong enough to deal with those Blood Cult bastards, and now even the first breeding of spiritual creatures! Amazing. Just amazing! It won’t be long before our Sichuan Tang Family is overflowing with venomous creatures.”

“Hoho, I was worried since one creature ran away from home, but now we’re hearing such good news.”

“How should we celebrate this?”

And since she had no experience raising venomous pets, Mother-in-law asked how they should celebrate this kind of occasion.

In response to that question, Seol Noona smiled and said,

“Shall I tell you how we do it at Beast Palace?”

“Ah, of course. Beast Palace raises many creatures, so you must have plenty of experience with this sort of thing, right? So, how do you do it at Beast Palace?”

“At our Beast Palace, we...”

That night, a red lantern was suddenly hung outside my quarters.

***

The one who was happiest about the possibility of Snow and Ice having a baby was none other than Seol Noona.

Ever since I showed her Snow and Ice, she had been eyeing them, saying their names went well with hers, Seolpyo. (TL Note: Seolpyo + Snow Leopard)

She kept saying Seolpyo and Snow Ice-Lizard were a perfect match.

So she had repeatedly asked if she could have one of the babies when they were born, and now that there was a chance of eggs, she was the most excited.

That’s why, late at night, she came to my quarters with Hwa-eun to make a reservation for adoption.

Seol Noona hugged my arm and asked in a cutesy voice,

“Ryong-ah, when Snow and Ice’s baby is born, you’ll give me one, right? Right?”

There is an unspoken rule among breeders.

Never give pets away for free.

No matter how expensive the creature is, if you give it away for free due to friendship, its perceived value tends to drop to zero in the recipient’s eyes.

Think about it, if you paid ten million won for a pet lizard, would you treat it carelessly or abandon it?

But if you got that same ten million won lizard for free from a friend, it’s more likely that you’d send it off to someone else or discard it the moment it becomes difficult to raise.

That’s why breeders like me never give pets away for free.

But if the person asking for a free adoption is family, then it’s a different story.

I couldn’t exactly tell Noona to pay ten million won.

Besides, Noona is from Beast Palace, the paradise of all animals in the Central Plains.

There’s no chance she would ever abandon it just because she got it for free, so I nodded for now.

Not to mention I’ve received plenty from her, martial arts training, a hefty allowance to use while at the Tang Family, and more.

Of course, the greatest gift I received was something money couldn’t buy: a family.

“I don’t know if they’ll drive out their young once they grow or form a family unit, but if they drive them out, I’ll give you one. If they stay as a family, then I can’t do anything about it.”

So I agreed for now, but lizard behavior is extremely diverse.

Some abandon their eggs, while others form family units. That’s why I couldn’t give a definite answer to Seol Noona.

In my previous life, there was a very expensive pet lizard called the Girdle-Tailed Armadillo Lizard.

Its entire body was covered in armor, and it lived among rocks in the desert. These lizards were known for forming groups on rocks.

They lived in large groups of 30 to 60, and since they gave birth to live young, the parents cared for their offspring, living together for generations on the same rock.

So if Snow and Ice had similar habits to those lizards, I wouldn’t be able to separate the baby from them, which is why I couldn’t make a promise to Noona.

As expected, Noona, being someone who raises beasts, understood and nodded.

“Of course. I wouldn’t want to separate a family either. If they stay together, I won’t ask. I only meant that if the parents kick the baby out, then I’d like one.”

Just as I was wrapping up the conversation with Seol Noona about the adoption plan.

I approached the window to close it.

-Ssshhhk!

“Watch out!”

-Thwack!

Smiling Seol Noona suddenly threw herself forward and grabbed something in front of me.

Then, scanning outside the window, she shouted,

“Who’s there!?”

What had flown in through the open window and landed in Seol Noona’s hand was a single arrow.

Upon confirming that, Hwa-eun dashed outside the quarters, and the sound of her flying dagger slicing through the air echoed out.

-Piiiiiing!

Soon, the elders and warriors of the family who had been preparing for bed swarmed to the front of the quarters, and fireworks flared up inside Tang Family Mountain.

Even Cho and Yohwa had shown up outside my quarters.

“An intruder! Find them!”

The warriors scattered in all directions to search for the intruder, and my father-in-law, who had rushed over, quickly turned to anger as he asked Hwa-eun for an explanation.

“What exactly happened, Hwa-eun!?”

“An arrow flew into Soryong’s quarters!”

“What!? Who would dare shoot an arrow into the Nine Progress Gate of the Tang Family! And into my son-in-law’s quarters, no less! Find them! Find them at all costs...!”

An arrow had flown deep into the Tang Family’s inner courtyard, specifically into the Inner Courtyard used by direct descendants. It was an emergency all over again.

The emergency status that had been lifted not long ago because of Bin was now back in full effect. At my father-in-law’s furious outburst, even more torches were lit up all around.

Just as the warriors who had gathered in the Inner Courtyard were about to scatter in search of the archer.

Nunim, who was holding the arrow, shook it slightly and spoke in a puzzled voice.

“Um, but there’s a letter and two jujubes tied to this arrow?”

“Jujubes!?”

“Jujubes!?”

“Unnie, did you say jujubes!?”

The family members reacted with surprise at the mention of jujubes.

When everyone looked at what Seol Noona was holding, there really were two jujube fruits and a letter tied to the arrow.

Upon seeing the jujubes, Father-in-law’s furious expression completely changed, and he gave an order to the warriors.

“Th-this... tell everyone to stop causing a fuss and disperse.”

“Yes, Family Head.”

Wait, his son-in-law nearly got killed by an arrow and now this? What was going on?

As I looked to Hwa-eun, confused and seeking an explanation, she took the arrow from Seol Noona and handed it to Father-in-law as she spoke.

“Soryong might not know, but jujubes symbolize swiftness or earliness in the Central Plains.”

“Swiftness or earliness?”

“Yes, and that’s why they’re used as the signature item of the Divine Thief, Shintu.”

“Shintu? As in a thief?”

“Well... yes, a thief, but more like a noble thief? Um, do you remember when we met the Beggar Emperor? This person is in the same rank as him, one of the Five Emperors of the Three Sovereigns and Five Emperors. He’s not one of the Three Sovereigns, but one of the Five Emperors, specifically, the Thief Emperor, and this is his sacred object."

‘So like a kind of righteous thief?’

At first, I was skeptical when I heard the word "thief", but when I learned that he was on the same level as the Beggar Emperor, I nodded.

It meant he was someone powerful.

“But why would someone like that send us a letter?”

I tilted my head, wondering why a thief would send a letter to our household, and Hwa-eun continued.

“The Divine Thief elder is practicing a martial art called One-Person All-Victory, and apparently, that sect has a strict rule.”

“A rule?”

“Yes. ‘Without stealing, one cannot receive any object from anyone.’ So, if there’s something that the Nine Great Sects or families like ours might have that he needs, he sends a letter like this ahead of time to say he’ll come steal it. And later, in return, he’ll do something even greater for you. That’s why when a letter from the Divine Thief arrives, families sometimes prepare the item in an easy-to-steal spot.”

“What kind of ridiculous rule is that...”

That you can’t receive anything unless you steal it? What kind of absurd rule was that?

I gave an incredulous look at the outrageous rule, and Father-in-law smiled.

“Well, even if he takes something, it’s not a total loss. It means you’ll get help from one of the Five Emperors.”

Basically, if you hand over one item and gain the aid of a powerful martial artist, it’s not really a loss. That seemed to be his point. But then Hwa-eun spoke with concern in her voice.

“Since the Thief Emperor elder is coming, we should inform the creatures too. They mustn’t attack or challenge him by mistake.

Cho, Yohwa, don’t bite anyone just because someone’s walking around at night, okay? It’d be a disaster if someone got hurt.”

She meant that Yohwa, Cho, or the Golden-Furred King Bees must be warned not to bite anyone accidentally.

She explained that if the creatures bit someone thinking it was a thief, it could become a serious incident for both sides, so they had to be cautious.

In response to Hwa-eun’s words, the two creatures let out cries as if acknowledging her.

-Tsurur.

-Kissit!

Nodding at their reply, Hwa-eun turned to her father and asked,

“But Father, what exactly is the item that the Thief Emperor is coming to steal?”

She seemed curious about what the target item was, and at that, Father-in-law looked flustered and turned his gaze to me.

Then his mouth opened, and an absurd statement popped out.

“S-Soryong. He’s coming to steal Soryong...”

“What!?”

Everyone was dumbfounded by the statement that I was the item he was coming to steal.

A strange silence fell over the front of the quarters, and then Hwa-eun’s voice cut through the stillness with a calm, sinking tone.

“Kids? Mom seems to have misspoken earlier, so from now, bite everything you see at night!”